Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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