Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
bring money and cleavage
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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