Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
