I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
then he tried to convert me to islam
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize