I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
