Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
