sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
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