I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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