one two three fourrrrnication!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Randomize
