I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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