they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
