Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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