Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
