i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
