At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize