We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
