Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
