I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize