you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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