he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
