4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Randomize
