you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
