the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize