he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize