Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I need water and some morals
Randomize
