So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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