My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
