Is it normal to miss your booty call?
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
