Rock
Scissors
Fuck
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
