Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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