Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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