So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
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