Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
