He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Randomize