I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize