So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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