i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
