Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
