Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
