She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
as a side note pls kill me
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
