i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
