I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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