its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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