how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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