We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
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