Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
