so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
