I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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