Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Michael Bay diarrhea
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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