Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
