these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
